family – View From My Shoes

A Treeless Christmas

Christmas is a special time of the year. Don’t forget what makes it so special.

I am a girl who LOVES Christmas: decorating, baking, gift giving, oh! and the music. It is a special time of the year for me. This year when it came time to decorate, we were wrapping up a kitchen and bathroom remodel that was painfully behind schedule. Workers would still be coming into our house to finish up after Thanksgiving. Construction and Christmas decorations do not mix. I was continually fretting over finding a time to decorate. One night I woke up and just accepted the fact that I was not going to be able to decorate for Christmas this year.

Once I accepted that reality, it was unbelievably freeing. A huge burden was lifted. It is now Christmas, I have three poinsettias that were given to me, a candle and a small wreath that were all gifts as well. That is the extent of our decorations. And guess what? As much as I love Christmas decorations, not having them has not changed one thing about the Christmas season. We’ve had family over, exchanged gifts, played Christmas music, but most importantly we have celebrated Jesus and God’s love for us.

Several Decembers ago, we had neighbors move in across the street who were from Denmark. As I was visiting with her and welcoming them to the neighborhood, she commented, “Everyone here wears Christmas. At home, we had Christmas in our hearts.” I think about that comment every year as I put up all of my trees and plan out my Christmas outfits for the month of December. Do I celebrate Christmas internally or externally?

God’s love and the gift of Jesus is incredible and life changing. I can experience His love and the peace it brings without one single Christmas decoration or Christmas sweater. His gift of forgiveness and unconditional love is here for us no matter what. I hope you will accept this gift and understand it was specifically given with you in mind.

1 John 4:9-10, “God showed how much he loved us by sending his one and only Son into the world so that we might have eternal life through him. This is real love—not that we loved God, but that he loved us and sent his Son as a sacrifice to take away our sins.

By the way, I am looking forward to decorating next year. It will be extra special.

Enjoy the Present Season

Christmas can be full of joy or full of pain and hurt. Make it the best possible by choosing to be present.

Wellness is a topic we hear about frequently. At work we are actually taking the eight dimensions of wellness, and looking at a separate component each month. As I was putting up Christmas decorations last weekend and going through all of the emotions involved there, I was reminded of the importance of being present which is a piece of emotional wellness.

We know the importance of being present. Psalm 118:24 tells us “This is the day that the Lord has made; let us rejoice and be glad in it.” There is a need to focus on the here and now and there are many tools that can help us do that such a journaling, meditation…. What I want to write about instead of the act of being present is what being present is NOT.

Being present is NOT dwelling on the past or worrying about the future. This was particularly hard for me this year as I was decorating. Every ornament I pulled out of the box, every item that I sat on a shelf, every stocking that I hung, brought back a memory tied to a Christmas of the past. Christmases with my grandma and all of my cousins packing around the “kids” table out in the back washroom. Christmases when my children were at home and helped me decorate the tree. The list and memories go on and on causing me to not be satisfied with what Christmas looks like now, this year, because it doesn’t look like what it used to.

For me, spending time thinking about the past Christmases brings fond memories that I deeply miss and wish I could recreate. For others, when you are dwelling on the past, you may be experiencing thoughts of regret. Maybe it is regret over things you said or did. Maybe Christmases in your past bring up memories of deep hurt. As you continue to roll through these memories and thoughts on repeat, you recreate anger, hurt, or all the feelings of the past that keep you from enjoying your today.

Christmas is a special season. Not only a season to celebrate with family, but also a season to give special recognition to the fact that God sent his son to earth to die on the cross so that we can be redeemed and be forgiven of our sins.

Whether memories are joyful or painful, we cannot let our minds stay in the past. You cannot focus on the present, when you are reliving the past. The same is true if you are worried about what next year will look like. Thinking about what could have been or what might have been doesn’t create joy or honor what God desires for us. We have to be present with what is right now. While my heart aches for the Christmases of the past, I choose to live and enjoy the Christmases of today.

As your mind wonders from the present, bring it back into focus by giving praise to God for the gift he gave us. Colossians 3:2, “Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on the earth.” Get busy living and quit using all of your thought time to dwell on the past or worry about the future. Use that energy to make this year special and to make a difference for God this season.

If you’re thoughts this season are heavier than in the past or there is a sadness you cannot shake, do not be too ashamed to seek help. If you just need a reminder to focus your thoughts on the good of today, read Ecclesiastes 3. Write out Ecclesiastes 3:11 & 12. Put it on your bathroom mirror, put it in your car. Hide it in your heart to remember to enjoy this year’s Christmas season.

“Yet God has made everything beautiful for its own time. He has planted eternity in the human heart, but even so, people cannot see the whole scope of God’s work from beginning to end. So I conclude there is nothing better than to be happy and enjoy ourselves as long as we can.” Ecclesiastes 3: 11& 12.

Trust God vs Doing it Yourself

Why do we try to solve our own problems instead of just trusting God? This is what He desires.

When Scott and I are driving somewhere new, we take completely opposite approaches. If I have any sort of idea where I’m going, I’m determined to find the location on my own. This often involves a U-turn or two. I use Google Maps only when I finally realize I cannot find the location, or if I’m going to be late because I keep backtracking. Scott on the other hand will use Google Maps right from the start. He has no problem trusting the map and letting it guide him. He just plugs in the address and heads to his destination without any worries. I however try to rely on my own skills. Grant it, this often resorts in honking horns as I abruptly change lanes or undue stress because I’m at the wrong place. Frequently I end up using the map despite my best efforts.

We have the same options when it comes to trusting God with our lives. Many times as Christians we feel we need to do it on our own. Maybe it is the theory that I got myself into this mess, I can get myself out. Maybe it is if I work hard enough, I can make this happen. If I keep pouring into this relationship, it will get better. I have to fix this before anyone finds out. Honestly, it can be any problem you are facing. We try to figure it out ourselves instead of trusting God. Otherwise, we wait until we have tried it ourselves and are out of options. Only then do we decide to reach out and ask God for help.

Proverbs 3:5-6 tell us, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him, and He shall direct your paths.” This Proverb tells us not only should we trust God instead of ourselves, but when we do, He will direct our paths. Just like the time and stress I could save by using a map, we can save ourselves heartache and costly mistakes. We also experience a lack of peace that wouldn’t be necessary if we acknowledge God by trusting our problem to Him. We must let go and trust Him.

Right now ask yourself, what are you trying to do yourself that needs to be turned over and trusted to God? What is keeping you up at night or always on your mind because you are working around the clock to solve a problem that God wants to help you solve? Take that problem and place it in this this verse. Make it a personal prayer.

I trust in you Lord with all of my heart to _________. I am not leaning on myself, but calling out to you so you can direct my path.

God is our protector

Like our phones, we have a protector. God is always there to keep us safe.

Recently I had to buy a new phone. I’m not the techie type of phone person who buys a phone every time a new version comes out. I hold on to mine as long as I can before investing in a new one. While I don’t often buy a new phone, I do like a cute case and change them often. So, as they were transferring everything over to my new phone, I was shopping for a cute case. There were no cases in the AT&T store that I was even willing to carry until I could get some ordered, so I headed to Target with my new phone. I was a nervous wreck; my phone felt very vulnerable as I walked through Target without it in a case. It’s funny how much security a phone case offers. I drop my phone all of the time without worry, but I knew I could not drop it now because it was unprotected.

I can think of so many times in my life I felt vulnerable, unprotected, all alone, or even abandoned. You may feel this way right now. You have a bill you cannot pay, or a problem bigger than you can fix. Your latest doctor visit didn’t go as planned. It feels someone at work is out to get you. I don’t know what problem you might be facing, but you are not facing it without the protection that God offers us.

In Exodus 14:14 the Israelites see the Egyptian army closing in on them. They had to feel unprotected, vulnerable. However, Moses told them to stand still. God was their protector and would fight for them. All they had to do was stand and watch. We are also told in Psalms 91:14, “The Lord says, “I will rescue those who love me. I will protect those who trust in my name. When they call on me, I will answer; I will be with them in trouble. I will rescue and honor them. I will reward them with a long life and give them my salvation.”

Think about how safe and comfortable you are throwing your phone around when it has a cover on it. We should feel the same sense of safety knowing we are covered by the Blood of Jesus. We are safe. We are protected.

Prepared for Tomorrow

I try to prepare for tomorrow, but I have to put tomorrow in God’s hands.

The last thing I do every evening before I leave the office is check my calendar for the next day. I just want to make sure I know what the next day holds. I check to make sure that if I have a meeting, I am prepared for that meeting. I check to see if I need to send out any reminders. Most importantly, I check to see what dress attire will be needed according to what is on my calendar and whether I need to pack a lunch or if I will be out of the office at lunch time. When I leave the office each evening, I want to be fully prepared for the next day so I don’t have to think about it once I have left.

The bible speaks to the importance of being prepared and working hard. Bluntly saying in Proverbs 10:4 that “lazy men are soon poor,” and even making references to how the ants work in the summer to prepare for the winter (Proverbs 6:6-8). It is important that I am prepared for the day in front of me, but what is equally important that once I am prepared, I put that behind me and go home. I don’t spend my evening worrying about what tomorrow may hold. I cannot be 100% prepared for tomorrow because I can’t know everything that will happen tomorrow.

Matthew 6:34, “Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself.” This verse is found at the end of the chapter where Jesus is telling the multitudes not to worry about where their next meal or clothing will come from because God feeds the birds and clothes the lilies of the field. While it is important to prepare, you cannot get caught up with worry and anxiety about tomorrow. Continually worrying about “what if” will rob you of the peace God has intended for you. Learning to do your part to be prepared and then turning everything else over to God is not easy. However, I can tell you without any hesitation that God is trustworthy, and he will take care of your tomorrows.

Gifts

You have been given spiritual gifts. Are you using them, or saving them up like gift cards?

Are you a gift card spender or keeper? Scott and I view gift cards very differently. I can promise you, if you gave me a gift card for Christmas, I used it by the end of January. It was given to me as a gift and given to me to be used. Scott on the other hand, saves every gift card for that magic moment when he may really need something. He saves them up like they are earning interest. I use them like they might expire in a week.

I think of this compared to the gifts God has given us. 1 Peter 4:10 tells us, “God has given each of you a gift from His great variety of spiritual gifts. Use them well to serve one another.” Think of this like God has given each of us a “gift card.” The question is, “What are you doing with it?” Are you using it as we are directed to do or are you saving it up? Peter goes on in verses 11 telling us, “Do you have the gift of speaking? Then speak as though God himself were speaking through you. Do you have the gift of helping others? Do it with all the strength and energy that God supplies.” Spiritual gifts are given to us to be used.

It is so easy to get distracted and find other tasks to do rather than using the gifts we have been given. I know every time I sit down to write, I see something that needs to be done. Just tonight, I swept the porch, filled bird feeders, watered flowers and completed an order on Amazon all while intending to sit down to work on a post. It is easy to put our gifts aside and save them for later because of distractors.

Another reason it is easy to hold onto that gift God has given you instead of using it is because we don’t feel adequate enough or deserving of the gift that is given to us. I struggle with this as well. I see so many who are beautifully gifted, that I struggle to put myself out there because I don’t feel my gift compares to theirs. A gift from God is great and not to be compared to others. It is to be used.

You have a gift. I Corinthians 7:7, “Yet each person has a special gift from God.” Spiritual gifts include wisdom, healing, prophecy, teachers, leaders, helpers, givers, and many more. Take a look at the scriptures below, pray about your gift, and then get busy using it.

1 Corinthians 12:8-10

1 Corinthians 12:27 & 28

Romans 12: 6-8

Correctly Applied Trust

Maybe the cabinet door can’t hold me up, but the Lord can.

I take a lot of pride in the fact that I can play on the floor with my grandbabies and then stand up fairly gracefully with a baby in each arm. Just standing up without using your arms can be a trick, but doing it with an extra 40 pounds makes it interesting. Evidently though, I am unable to bend over and get a dishwasher pod without leaning heavily on the cabinet door. Last night while bent over and leaning on the cabinet, it gave away. Evidently, from the numerous times I have leaned on the door in the past, it couldn’t hold me up last night. I did not face plant, but I do have a bruised knee from the unexpected loss of support.

This made me think about where we look for support in life. Who do you view as your provider? Who do you turn to for answers? All too often we think our job will take care of our financial needs, or that credit card is there as our back up if we need it. I’ve relied on my spouse as my main problem fixer. While he has earned credit towards this title for tasks such as fixing the cabinet door I just broke, he can’t fix everything. Not even our government, our church, our savings account or our image can guide us through life. The Lord is our only provider. He is our sole source.

“Trust in the Lord, and do good; dwell in the land, and feed on His faithfulness. Delight yourself also in the Lord, and He shall give you the desires of your heart.” Psalm 37:3 & 4

“Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways acknowledge Him and He shall direct your path.” Proverbs 3:5 & 6

There have been times in my life where God was all I had. He provided peace; He provided comfort; He provided wisdom. No person, no item, could provide what God provided.

Finding the Perfect Gift

Spending time with friends and family gives you insight to what they want just as spending time with God allows you to know what He wants in your life.

I have this theory about gift buying. If you spend time with someone, watch and pay attention, you will have an idea what to get them for Christmas. You won’t have to ask them what they want. You will hear them talk about what they like, what they need, or you will get to know how they like to spend their time and what their favorite things are. You will also learn what they don’t like. You shouldn’t have to ask what they want. This theory works out better some years than others. Of course for the family that lives out of state, we don’t see them often. I don’t know what they need or want. I have to call and ask.

Theories are just that, an idea that tries to explain something. However, without a doubt I can tell you this theory does apply to our relationship with our Heavenly Father. The more time we spend with Him, time in prayer, time in the word, the more we will know what He wants. In Jeremiah 9:24, we are told, “Let him who glories glory in this, that he understands and knows me.” We are expected to know the Lord and keep a relationship with Him. It is because we know Him and spend time with Him that we know what He wants in our life. He wants us to honor Him and be full of the Fruit of the Spirit, but we only know how that is lived out in our life if we are spending time with Him. We are told again in 1 John 2:3 & 4, “Now by this we know that we know Him, if we keep His commandments. He who says ‘I know Him,’ and does not keep His commandments is a liar.”

As we are rushing around trying to find the perfect gift for our family and spending time with our loved ones, don’t forget to spend time with the One who loves us the most. This is the only way you will know what He desires from you.

Keep It Simple

Sometimes we try to make God’s word deep, mysterious and complicated. His truths are real and simple.

Last week I was listening to a bible study podcast. The speaker had me flying through various scriptures to the point I felt like I was back in Children’s Church participating in Bible races. After racing to the seventh scripture in a chain of scriptures, the speaker, with all the enthusiasm you could ever express, questioned, “Do you see it? Isn’t that just beautiful?” I have to confess, I didn’t see it. I hit pause and went back through the chain of scriptures looking for it. I felt so inadequate because I couldn’t see it. I pressed play and listened to her explanation. After she explained the original Greek meaning of several words and explained all of the connections, I finally got it. It was beautiful and helped me realize just how beautiful God’s word is.

Being real here, after I listen to or read a book that takes such a deep dive into scripture, I do feel enlightened and closer to God, but sometimes I always feel so inadequate. I start reading the Bible looking for deep meaningful connections only to become frustrated because I don’t find them.

Changing subjects, Scott loves to grill steaks. It is one of our favorite meals. I do the marinating and Scott grills. I have a two-day process to get steaks ready to grill. It involves sitting in a marinade for 24 hours and then requires a top secret rub before the steaks sit out for several hours to get to room temperature. We always thought it was worth the effort until our last anniversary. We went to eat at a prime steak house. For some reason on this visit, Scott struck up a conversation with the waiter and asked what rub or marinade they put on the steak. Expecting a complex answer, we got, “salt and pepper.” We had to come home and try it. It proved to be just simply wonderful.

Simply wonderful – that is what God’s word is. Recently, I have been digging into God’s word looking for some personal direction. I found the answer teaching a PK Sunday School class last Sunday. The theme was “God has a Plan for You.” I told a favorite bible story of the coat of many colors and we practiced the memory verse, “I know the plans I have for you says the Lord.” It is right there plain and simple. I didn’t have to dig and search.

Here are some of the simple truths that I have taught to 4 year olds recently. While deep studies bring a deep understanding, the truth is simple.

God made me just the way he wanted – “I am fearfully and wonderfully made.” Psalms 139:14

God Loves me – “See what great love the Father has lavished on us, that we should be called children of God!” 1 John 3:1

Jesus died on the cross for our sins – “While we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Romans 5:8

God has a plan for you – For I know the plans I have for you declares the Lord.” Jeremiah 29:11

God looks at the inside – “The Lord sees not as man sees: Man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.” 1 Samuel 16:7

We can trust God – “And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good.” Romans 8:28

God provides for your needs – “God will supply every need according to His riches in glory.” Phil. 4:19

We are to love others – “A new commandment I give to you that you love one another as I have loved you,” John 13:34

Prayer works – “If you ask anything in My name, I will do it.” John 14:14

God’s word is true – “All scripture is inspired by God and profitable for teaching,” 2Timothy 3:16

There is something to be said for the simple truth. We don’t have to make it harder than it should be.

Comment or share if you find this true.

Voice of Lies

You can do whatever God has asked you to do. He is there to help you.

I don’t understand how the majority of the time I feel there isn’t anything I can’t do. As a matter of fact, I often get myself in trouble taking on jobs by myself when I really should ask for help. But, why would I ask for help? I can do it myself. I even catch myself refusing help because “I can do it.” Just this week I was moving the patio furniture out to power wash the porch. I was carrying four chairs stacked together. Scott saw me, and came over to help. Through gritted teeth, I refused the help replying, “I’ve got it.” Maybe it is stubbornness; maybe it is over confidence. No matter, 99% of the time, I think I can do anything that is placed in front of me.

The problem is 1% of the time this voice comes in my head and at the worst times. This voice tells me:

You are in over your head.
You are not smart enough to figure this out.
You are not qualified to handle this challenge.
Soon others are going to realize you are incompetent.
I am bad mom.
Scott would be better off with someone who gave him more attention.

The list goes on and on and is very convincing. It is a voice of lies!

I know I’m not alone. This voice of lies speaks to all of us. Even Moses must have heard this same voice. He expressed his self-doubt to the Lord four times in Exodus 3 & 4.

He first asked the Lord, “Who am I that I should go to Pharaoh and bring the children of Israel out of Egypt? The Lord quickly answered, “I will certainly be with you.”
Moses then made my favorite statement. “But suppose they will not believe me.” Suppose, how often do I suppose something – assume that something is true without proof or knowledge?
Moses’ next doubt had some legitimacy which makes it easier to believe, “I am slow of speech and slow of tongue.” The Lord tried to prove to Moses where he should put his trust. The Lord responded, “Who has made man’s mouth? … Now go, and I will be with your mouth and teach you what you shall say.”
He should have stopped there, discounted the voice of lies and headed out to do as the Lord had commanded. Instead, he makes one more plea. “Lord, please send someone else.” The beautiful part of this story is while the Lord was angered, He sent Aaron to be with Moses.

I have to say, Moses helps me feel better about myself.

The Lord is the voice of truth and has the answer to every lie that comes into your mind. While it is true that we cannot do some of the hard things in life alone, the rest of the truth is that we have this friend, Jesus, who has promised “My grace is sufficient for you, for My strength is made perfect in weakness.” 2 Corinthians 12:9. Read that again. His grace covers our weakness. We can do anything he asks us to do. He will cover for us where we cannot do it alone.

Next time the voice of lies begins to creep into your thoughts, remember the Lord had an answer for every one of Moses’ doubts, and the Word tells us, “God is able to make all grace abound to you, that you, always having all sufficiency in all things, may have an abundance for every good work.” 2 Corinthians 9:8,