God’s Love – Page 3 – View From My Shoes

Scars

You can’t make it through life without them.

scar I am fortunate to not have very many scars, but that also means I don’t have very many exciting stories to go with them.

Not long ago I was sitting with a friend on the edge of the pool. Both of us at sometime in our lives have broken a bone in our foot. Her story is much more exciting than mine. She was getting down from a life guard stand. I’m sure to save a life or something. I was simply walking across a parking lot and fell. Anyway, different circumstances, same injury and ironically, different scars. Truthfully, my scar, that you can barely see, actually came from the “old lady” bunion surgery I decided to have since I had to be in a boot for 6 weeks for the broken bone in my foot to heal. It was a matter of killing two birds with one stone.

The point I want to make is the same injury, the same surgery, the same life event results in a completely unique scar for each individual. Not only is this true for physical scars, but emotional scars follow the same pattern. Two people can go through the exact same event (divorce, death of a child, loss of a job, death of a spouse) and the event will result in completely different scars.

While I can by no means begin to explain how the body heals, I can tell you we are wonderfully designed by God to recreate cells and make new skin to heal wounds that would otherwise be life threatening. The same is true with our emotional scars.

There will be scars in life. No one is promised to live scar free. True, some have multiple scars that are deep, hurtful and life changing, while others of us have managed to live life with only a few scars. John 16:33 tells us, “In this world you will have trouble.” There is no way around problems or hurts in life. However, there is more to the story. It is the part before and after this statement in John 16:33 that is the most important. “…in Me you may have peace….. but take heart! I have overcome the world.” We will have hurts in this life and no one can tell us how to get through them because they are different for everyone. While we can learn from others, we cannot duplicate anyone else’s experience. We have to heal in our own way and yes healing usually involves a great big ugly scab. The beauty is in the new skin that is formed under the scab and only revealed in time.

During that time when the scab is big and ugly, itchy and wanting someone to pick at it, remember that “The Lord is good, a refuge in times of trouble. He cares for those who trust in Him.” Nahum 1:7. Although I don’t have countless scars, I have one or two that are pretty deep, and I can tell you with the utmost confidence, that the new skin under the surface of that scar is fresh and beautiful. Hang in there and be proud of the scars you have.

Where is the best place to hide your dirty laundry?

Right now we are going through the miserable experience called selling our house. This means that within a moment’s notice we have to evacuate the house and make sure it is “show ready” as we departure. Since we have been doing this for several months now, we have it down like a well-rehearsed dance routine.

First let me say, there are three levels of clean. There is “we live here” clean. This means there may be a glass or two in the sink, some books on the sofa, a load of clothes on the dryer to be folded and of course the bed isn’t made. Next there is “company” clean. We can go from “live here” clean to “company” clean in about 15 minutes. However the third level of clean is completely different. It is “show ready” clean. This level of clean allows for people to go through your closets and cabinet at free will. For us it also includes a list of crazy steps such as opening hidden spice rack cabinets, putting out notes about instant hot water, washing a load of clothes (so the laundry room smells like laundry) and walking out of the house backwards followed by the vacuum cleaner to make sure there are no footprints in the carpet. This dance also includes the ritual of taking items like the dog crate, the close hamper, the blankets from the sofa and shoving them in the car. These are the items that are a part of our everyday lives. However, we hide them in the car when prospective buyers are scheduled to visit. Our routine takes us about 30 minutes. 30 minutes to create the illusion of perfection.

car

While we may be able to create this illusion for perspective house buyers, I realized I often try to create this illusion with God. The God that knows my every thought; the God that loves me more than the human mind can comprehend. This is the God I want present myself to as the perfect Christian with the faith to move mountains. In order to appear this way, I hide my fear and doubt from Him pretending it doesn’t exist. I go to Him in prayer like a mighty warrior pretending I’m not scared or worried about anything. Why do I think I need to or even can hide these emotions from my Heavenly Father.

Please tell me I am not alone. Maybe you are angry, defeated, or overwhelmed. Do you present these emotions to God in prayer, or do you feel like when you talk to God it has to be a conversation of love, peace and confidence? Maybe, just maybe, we set higher expectations for ourselves than God does. 1 John 3:20, “If our hearts condemn us, we know that God is greater than our hearts and he knows everything. ” Our hearts know we cannot measure up, but thank goodness, God is greater and more understanding than our human hearts.

Back to selling the house, when I am confused why the house hasn’t sold yet or why we haven’t found a new house that we can call OUR house, instead of just asking God why and admitting I don’t understand, I go to God and pretend that I fully trust in his timing. While I do trust him, I try to hide the dirty laundry that in reality I only 75% – 80% trust him. The remaining percent is full of questions and the desire to take the matter into my own hands.

We were actually driving around with the car full of our hidden secrets (like no one else has dirty clothes in a clothes hamper at their house) when God placed on my heart how I try to hide my undesirable emotions and feelings from Him. Now, as I am sitting here writing my thoughts, I am vowing to be more honest with my God who already knows the truth anyway. I pray that you can come to a place where there is a deep enough trust to be honest with God as well. He already knows and He loves you the same.

Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you. 1 Peter 5:7

Bueno – No Bueno – Mucho Bueno

With God often you are getting more than you asked

unnamed Today was one of those days. When lunch time approached there was no way I could face the cottage cheese and celery I had so thoughtfully packed this morning. Based on my current stress level, a steak quesadilla from Taco Bueno was what the doctor ordered. I had a few minutes before my next meeting so I quickly headed for my lunch therapy. I took advantage of the car ride to call my daughter in Denver. She is my witness. As I pulled up to the speaker, I ordered by steak quesadilla and continued forward. When arriving at the window, I dutifully paid my bill and drove back to the office. I wrapped up my conversation with my daughter and headed to my desk. After clearing a spot on my desk for lunch and opening the computer to prepare for a working lunch. It was at that moment, the first glance into the sack, when I realized I did not have my order. In the bag were two burrito shaped packages. I was highly disappointed and angry I hadn’t checked the bag earlier. I opened the first one and it was some type of bread similar to an fry bread smeared with refried beans and stuffed with taco meat, cheese, lettuce and tomatoes. It only took me seconds to devour the tasty surprise. The second package contained some kind of burrito. I tore it open before biting into it to see what my unordered gift might hold. It busted open revealing rice, beans, chicken, sour cream, tomatoes and even cilantro. All I requested was a simple quesadilla – meat, cheese, tortilla. While at first I was disappointed I didn’t get what I ordered. It only took a few tastes to see I received so much more. Pity the person that ordered burritos and got my quesadilla

I think this is often so true of our request to God. Currently 3 or our 5 children are on the hunt for purchasing their first home. Anyone who has been through this process remembers the emotional roller coaster. I have been reminiscing and comforting them by relaying memories of finding a house and praying day and night that the Lord would provide a way for us to get that house. When the offer wouldn’t be accepted or someone would offer more, I would be crushed that my prayers were not answered. However in time, God always provided a house that was so much more than the house I had chosen. It was more than meat and cheese. It was a house with lettuce tomatoes and sour cream.

When I was young and going to college, I prepared and prayed for a teaching job. All I ever wanted was to be a teacher. That was my life’s goal. However, God had such a more perfectly designed plan. While teaching is still my passion, God has taken me further in my career than I ever dreamed.

Closer to home, most recently my son and expecting daughter-in-law decided to move from a house only minutes away back to her home town 12 hours away. I have prayed many times that God would send something to change their minds and make them want to stay. Again, I was praying for meat and cheese when God probably has lettuce and tomatoes planned for them. I feel I may have been limiting them because of my selfishness.

As a child in Sunday school I learned to quote Isaiah 55:8-9, “For My thoughts are not your thoughts, Nor are your ways My ways,” says the Lord. “For as the heavens are higher than the earth, So are My ways higher than your ways, and My thoughts than your thoughts. I also memorized Ephesians 3:20, “Now to Him who is able to do exceedingly abundantly above all that we ask or think.” These scriptures are fundamental to how I was raised and taught as a child, but I so quickly forget them when I get focused on what I want and not on what God has planned.

Don’t fret over not getting meat and cheese when in time God will provide you with much more.

The Cleaning of the Vacuum Roller

Are you entangled in everyday life?

It all started as we were watching the Thunder game last night. I don’t know if it was exuberance or rage, but popcorn went flying across the floor. Enough so I had to drag out the vacuum cleaner. As I was sweeping, a rogue popcorn hull was just rattling around in the sweeper head refusing to move up into the canister. Thus causing me to do the unthinkable, turn the sweeper upside down to stick my hand in the sweeper head to remove the hull. Unfortunately, I found myself face to face with at least a year’s worth of thread, yarn and hair (oh the hair) wrapped around the vacuum roller. a forty-five minute task ensued. I began with a lone piece of yarn from a long ago kitchen rug. I just pulled on one end and it easily unwound. I then moved on to what had to be half a spool of yellow thread. It wasn’t so easy to remove. I resorted to the scissors. Finally I was down to just hair. Scissors proved to be unsuccessful ergo resorting to a razor blade. After quite some amount of work, the roller was freed.

Now keep in mind. The vacuum cleaner did nothing to cause this to happen. It was just doing its job sucking up debris from our carpets, yet still found itself wrapped up with shreds of waste. How true is this of our lives? At least mine. I get so caught up doing life, just living day to day, that I get wrapped up and entangled with all the meaningless details and distractions. I can get so wound up that I forget to focus on the purpose for which I was created. Maybe it is the pressures from work that you cannot leave at the office, but carry them home dragging around your ankle. Or could it be bills that seem to keep mounting up – not the bills from over spending that you created, but just the bills of living. Sometimes for me it is the time I spend on silly task like cleaning the vacuum roller instead of sitting with my family to watch the rest of the basketball game or the time I spend on FB and Candy Crush (true confession). I can get so wrapped up on daily tasks that nothing else seems to matter. There is a false sense of urgency that creates false priorities. They build up around me just like the hair on the vacuum roller and keep me from my quiet time, time I could spend ministering to others or time I could simply spend with my family.

Some of these entanglements are as easy to remove as the yarn from the kitchen rug. However, some are so deeply entrenched a razor blade is required for extraction. In Philippians 3:13 Paul talks about forgetting the past. Oh, and did he have a past. I think it would be safe to say, Paul was carrying around chains comparable to Ebeneezer Scrooge. Yet, he was able to drop them and move forward in a victorious life as designed by God. In verse 17-20 Paul calls us to join him and follow his example of living a life focused on Christ. He follows that with directions to take note of those that are focused on earthly things for they are headed for destruction.

How do we keep from getting wrapped up in the details of life? One thread at a time. Start small by making a commitment to drop one meaningless task for one task that God desires to be a priority in your life. I wish I could say I had this mastered. I’m probably the worst at putting God in second place to common house hold chores. In Luke 14-24, Jesus tells a parable of man who invited many to a supper, but the invitees had many excuses: plow the field, test oxen, be with a new wife. So, what did the master do? He sent his servant out to the highways and hedges to find guest that were willing to drop what they were doing and attend his dinner. As I was cleaning my vacuum roller last night, I realized I am often too wrapped up in my priorities to set them aside and focus on God’s priorities. I hope you don’t have to spend forty-five minutes looking at the underneath side of your sweeper to be reminded life should be lived for God’s purpose.

Why Shoes?

Trust that God has you prepared

I spent many hours thinking about what to call my blog, and I kept coming back to something that had to do with shoes. This could be because I absolutely love shoes or because once I get something in my head, I can’t think of anything else. Anyway, there are two reasons why shoes are so great. First, no matter how much weight you gain or lose, your shoes always fit. Second, a great pair of shoes can change an ordinary outfit into extraordinary.

The thing is every pair of shoes in my closet serves a different purpose. I have a pair I wear for exercise, a pair for casual jeans versus the pair for dressier jeans, and of course multiple pairs for work. I often think about my day and pick an outfit around the pair of shoes I need to wear that day. If I’m going to be on my feet all day visiting school sites, I need to wear more comfortable shoes. If my day will be spent sitting in meetings all day, it is the perfect day to pull out the killer heels.

However, it was just this last week, that I was caught unprepared and without the shoes I needed. According to the local weather guy, it was going to be a beautiful day with rain in the evening. I was going to be sitting in interviews all day, so out came a pair of stilettos that easily added four inches to my short stature. As the interviews were coming to a close, I received a text message asking me to come over to a school site for an unexpected meeting. I was glad to do this, unfortunately when approaching the doors to leave the school, I quickly noticed the rain had come in early, and I was parked at the furthest end of the parking lot. Trying to block some rain with the books in my hand, I headed out in the deluge. I tried to run at one point, but that was a complete joke and a sure way to break an ankle. What I needed was rain boots. What I had were shoes that created a genuine risk to my ability to stay upright. I actually at about the half-way point in the parking lot contemplated taking them off and going barefoot.

As I was drying off in the car, one thought lead to another and I was soon thinking about how wonderfully God always prepares us for the adventure, adversity or any circumstance we face. I thought of the many times I found myself in life situations that required hiking boots or full on combat boots, yet God made sure I was prepared for those times and had the shoes I needed to get through them.

One small example would be about the time my children were in high school and not so dependent upon me. I felt the need to reconnect with some friends that were in the same place in life. As young mothers, we were extremely close taking our daughters to gymnastics and dance together as well as sitting shoulder to shoulder through countless softball games. We now lived in three different areas of the metro, but easily available to meet for dinner. After the first dinner, it was decided our meetings should become a monthly event. Only God knew that after about 8 months of regular dinners and a rekindled friendship, I would begin down the path of care taker for a terminally ill spouse. It was these ladies who were by my side and carried me through this dark time in life.

Ephesians 2:10 ” For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand that we should walk in them.” Not only are we created by God, but He also intends good for our lives and He will prepare us to be all He desires. I know I could not serve in my role at work without the numerous mentors God placed in my life at an early age. I could not be a friend or confidante for others without the life experiences God has allowed me to experience. It is only because of the path we have walked and the shoes we have worn, that we can be who God desires us to be. Currently your life path may need steel-toed construction boots or you may be enjoying a comfy pair of rejuvenating beach sandals. Which ever it may be, love the path you are on and the shoes you are wearing. God has prepared your for this time.

In the morning, when you are picking out what shoes to wear, know that God has prepared you for what you will face on this day.